PS:21 – What can I do?

I know I’m all over the map lately. It’s my life currently. I’m at that spot where I’m waiting to see what this job offer brings. Why? Maybe it’s time to mix things up a bit more than just being the “company owner”.

July 2014 I did get a new title added to my business card: Dad. Big upgrade, huge list of responsibilities, and a cute little girl who does like laughing at my jokes.  But since then I’ve picked up bigger jobs, more work, more responsibility. Talk about stress.

I’ve looked at starting a website, I’ve tried expanding my product lines, I am upping my game, but sadly a lot of it falls flat. I started a ministry website before she was born, really looking to write and share my faith more online. The last post was April 2015. Not too active for over a year.

I want to be a good dad. My dad wasn’t the steady job guy for quite a long time. As a kid he was sick a lot, he did things like rebuilt cars, handyman work. He did get a 9-to-5 job, till he got hurt on the job, but my dad did his best to take care of us all – and that’s what I’m trying to do too.

I’ve been told “Chuck why don’t you do something else?” maybe this job is it. Sure same field, but dedicated pay, insurance, I could simplify my taxes! The lack of my own business I could turn things down, no LLC taxes, no long-form tax returns, simple.

The thing is I do love doing what I do. This past week has been insanely stressful, but at the end of the day, I’ve gotten some amazing responses from my client base. More of a club it feels like than a business sometimes, but imagine how much the stress goes down when you read:

Huzzah! Thank you for your heroic efforts.

Thanks, as always, for all that you do for us!

Everything looks perfect on our site. Praise the Lord!

Thanks Chuck for all you are doing!

Sure I had some customers not as happy, but in the end not a single customer left, and the lights continue to be up and online 95 hrs, 11 mins at the current check of remote monitoring.

It’s not all about the praise. I mean it doesn’t hurt 🙂 but at the end of the day I love working for these people. Sure it may not be $300 a month clients or billing them each for support @ $65/hour – but it’s a blessing to get a check from someone saying “Thanks for your help”. It’s nice to know your work is appreciated.

But I’m thinking more and more like a dad. So much coming up in life, so much I want to have Lilly do. Some tough choices to make do I stay or do I go.

Some things to definitely pray about.

Being a dad.

402 days ago I didn’t have any idea what I was doing. What’s changed since then? I get even less sleep.

When Lilly was born life wasn’t the best, business was failing, life was stressful. Never did I imagine that afternoon going into the hospital, I would end up, meeting Lilly Grace.

As a kid I’ve always imagined being a dad. My dad was pretty awesome, supportive, loving, and always an open ear (even to this day!) and I hoped I could share that with my own kids.

You know what they say, it’s nothing like you plan. NICU for a week, constipation, gas, urgent care visit. I don’t think I ever considered that is what my parents went through. If it was even half of what I’ve gone through, they need more hugs, as do I.

Lilly is a daddy’s girl through and through, I’m sure she’ll go through her mommy’s girl phase in time. For now though we hang out and play through the day, and every night I sing, talk, and pray with her as we get ready for bed.

I didn’t plan for anything I’ve gone through, not a thing. But when I babble with her, or share a drink, sandwich, Jamba Juice, you name it. Planning doesn’t matter. It’s that moment. That single moment in time. And it’s awesome.

She’s sleeping right now and I’m trying to do an ounce of work and write a bit, but when they say life changes with kids? They aren’t lying.

Today’s picture is Lilly @ 1 day old, precious little feet 🙂 <3

Writer’s Block

I’ve been wanting to write lately, but what to write?

I am back on a kick in which I’ve said to myself:

“Self, start a website”

And yet, I have 3 current website projects for customers which I have yet to complete. Some are hold ups on “approvals” others are ones I’m stuck and trying as hard as I can to complete.

The desire is on my heart though to create a website which is helpful, one that works in the realm of Q&A, providing visitors with a portal in which to have common tech questions answered.

“But where is the money?!”

Well I set out to answer that question, and did you know there are bloggers out there posting about their passions, expertise, and even just helpful tips who make anywhere from $3,000->$10,000 a month? Well I didn’t either, but I’ve found a ton and their sites are actually fun to read!

I am leaning more and more towards the project, may not be the BEST use of my time, but at the end of the day, I think I’d enjoy it.

The personal blog isn’t as much as a huge desire for me anymore, I still want to try and do a post a day to provide a personal outlet – but I’d like my posts to be more than just a place to vent.

For now, keep checking back – maybe something random or a picture of a cute kid now and again 🙂

5 Days without Writing?

It’s been a while! What have I been up to? Oh a pile of projects + partying with a little girl in Sacramento! Crazy stuff for sure! But tomorrow is the big day. The big 1! Hard to believe that about this time last year I was going into a hospital for “dehydration and braxton hicks” and in the early AM met a little girl named Lilly 🙂

Projects should be calming down, hopefully even more posts coming soon! Few songs I want to share, some more thoughts rolling around in my head, but stay tuned!

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Lilly Goes to Sacramento on the Amtrak!